I might appear very “emo” or “goth” with these page titles. Oh well, I suppose we all must take on a guise every so often — though I am neither stereotype. Here, I shall introduce you to my family members, all the way down to my pets. Yes, my pets. They’re important too, I believe so.
Robert (my dad) — He’s ancient old, like… nearly 60. He’s 1/2 Mexican, so he’s probably the brownest person in the family. He’s super smart too (with a masters in both physics and math), but since he hasn’t been in school for ages, he doesn’t remember so much. I rather enjoy having intelligent conversations with him about life and other stuff, but he sometimes gets on my nerves (as all parents tend to do).
Frances (my mom) — She’s pretty chill, but she works really hard around the house. She cannot ever keep the house clean; first it must become messy, then she will clean it. It never stays clean… but I suppose I assist with that dilemma. She’s a shopping fiend and has sort of dragged me into the shopping experience as well. Now that I’ve been accepted at UNC Chapel Hill, she’s eager to begin college shopping.
Megan (the sister) — Megan is… a very bizarre creature. She’s best described as dessert: if you get too much of her, you’ll get sick. I love her to death, as all siblings love one another, but we do not always get along. I rather enjoy when she visits (if she wakes up before 4pm).
Cooper (the brother) — His real name is Mason, but I suppose you can forget I said that, since he doesn’t care for the name. He’s very funny, when he tries, but tends to quote other people’s intelligence before coming up with an original joke. He’s typically glued to his computer, either surfing the web or playing games with people all across the world. He also plays guitar and practices stage-dives into his bed. He’s only 17 months older than me, so we’re fairly close.
My Cats — I would do a separate section for each one, but this is much simpler. Gobi is the oldest (he’s 15) and we found out about a month ago that he has bone cancer. He has a huge tumor in his jaw, so large now that he cannot close his mouth fully. So there is a lot of drool. His gums are black and his teeth are brown. I feel bad for the little bugger and I’m certainly going to miss him when he is gone; we’ve had him since I was only 3! I cannot remember a time without him. Roger is probably the second oldest and the biggest pain in the ass you will ever meet. He weighs 22 pounds and he enjoys attacking the other cats. He’s big, he’s black, and he has the girliest meow. Then there are Benji and Mowgli, the two gay lovers. Benji is lean and clean and has been beating up on Mowgli ever since we got him as a kitten. Mowgli, we believe, may be retarded. He has to be the stupidest cat we have ever owned. But he’s also one of the prettiest, with his beautiful mane and his poofy fur.
Buster (the dog) — I hate him. He’s lazy and smells.
So there is my “family.” I guess on paper we don’t look as demented as I think we are.
